The anonymity of the internet is an amazing thing.
At 2'o clock in the morning it can be a bit depressing though.

It irks me at times when i see or hear someone talking about a artist "selling out" or how their new album is nothing like their old one and is thus terrible. I mean maybe its just me because music is such an incredibly important part of who i am but seriously? are you fucking kidding me?
Selling out is nothing more then signing to a major label and while for pushovers this could be bad, most bands retain creative control over their music. Theres nothing wrong with this. Maybe you feel hurt because now your not the only one who likes your favorite band but hey i guess if you want to pay for the band members house, their kids, family,expenses, etc...
Even if you dont look at this from a stand point of thats what their doing for a living and its just like getting a raise; you can look at it from the message.
They are here to have their music be heard.
Your so punx rawk you want to change the world? Well are you going to do it by yourself?
i doubt it.
Well now im just rambeling but i guess my point is you listen to a band because you like them, you listen to their next album because you liked the last one. If you dont like it after you hear it ok then dont listen to it anymore, but dont just look at the name of the company on the inside and immediatly start tearing it down without ever giving it a chance.
i could go on but id rather not.

I get stuck in certain mindsets, certain ways. There always the opposite of the one i know is the better choice or idea.Theres the way i act and the way i want to act, very rarely do they sync up.
Maybe i should do something about it.
I say that, but i wont.
I probably wont even remember i wrote that when i wake up tommarow, it definitatly wont cross my mind when im on the metro and no i wont smile at anyone i pass on the street.
Im just going to laugh at the futility of it all.

Hey were supposed to be having epiphanies right now.
Stop laughing.
Epiphany having is serious business.

this means more to me then you could ever know. I hope you dont mind.
You'll get to hear it eventually and if you dont like just tell me and ill never sing it again.
If your into it keep it up, cause we could work wonders with this, kid.

I hate to admit it but im a hypocrite.
sadly bitching dosent seem to be doing anything about it.

Oh well.

i found this cool folk punk comp on last.fm, some gang chorus' and gravely voices over rambunctious acoustic guitar are enough to make anyone optomistic.

(i wasnt going to write this but Kristine put me up to it. Now please put your glove back on, you cant just go around slapping people willy nilly.)

Did you know?
I doubt you ever did, months later it comes to mind and i can still only hear my hollow words.
The memorys all to clear, a memory so unwanted it could never go away.
That silence.
I could of drowned in that silence.
In fact i was sure i had, my lungs barely expanding, choking under the weight of regret.
I could of fallen to my knees right there, on that dirty kitchen floor, but that wouldnt of solved anything. The point of no return had already been passed, miles ago, days ago.
Doomed from the start comes out so cliche, but this was the second start.
I expected it fully.
You found a few things to say, nicetys to put yourself at ease, then fell into the cadence.
My mind was reeling, i thought i wanted this, i thought, i thought....
I searched your face for an answer,but your fathomless blues eyes reflected back no uncertainty.
Did you know?
These promises of future rendezvous were in vain.
Lies as much as every other word you ever told me.
I knew.
If you walked out that door.
How could you not know? Not see?
Even after all this i never felt you owed something to me.
Im still just stuck with this image of the night before. I was ashamed to think id never held you so tight.
Did you know?
seems an unanswerable question.
Did you know you would never see me again.

i dont understand
i dont understand
i dont understand
i dont understand
i dont understand

why you do that to me
Was it bliss not seeing you everyday?
Your red hair getting burned into my memory.
i dont want this.
i never wanted this.
i just want you.

Its not that i cant talk to people, its just that i dont.
Its a waste of words.

Just to try myself though i went through with it and met you at the metro.
Never face to face. Never until the day before.
You didnt seem reserved at all when you got in,
maybe just a little once you got us lost in the ghetto.
Two hours of driving with no destination in mind.
Its not what i expected, nor do i expect it again
We'll probably remain the strangers that we were.

Oh, no matter how much fabreeze you spray, that still has a very distinctive smell.

There are times, sitting here in the dark with nothing but this glowing screen to reflect upon, that all sense of purpose is lost. Pressing ideas and thoughts that go unfinished, adventures never to be returned to. Who we are, Who we've always wanted to be. This new found sense of purpose likly to be lost as soon as the screen goes dark, a new found sense of direction to get lost in new ways. Could we change the world if we could never even change ourselves? How could we change ourselves if indecision never let us make up our minds. Its so easy to be negative. The mind set is right.
I dont know where this is goin but its looking like the place i began.
Never planned to be there again.

I dont have a flair for writing like this. Lyrics are nothing, so why cant i put down one paragraph that isnt meaningless bullshit and overused emotions. WHAT THE FUCK.

Im still searching for a former clarity.

The Dream is Over

God is a Concept
by whichwe measure our pain
I don't believe in magic
I don't believe in I-ching
I don't believe in Bible
I don't believe in Tarot
I don't believe in Hitler
I don't believe in Jesus
I don't believe in Kennedy
I don't believe in BuddhaI
I don't believe in Mantra
I don't believe in Gita
I don't believe in Yoga
I don't believe in Kings
I don't believe in Elvis
I don't believe in Zimmerman
I don't believe in Beatles
I just believe in me...and that reality